If you kin see de light a…

If you kin see de light at daybreak, you don’t keer if you die at dusk. It’s so many people never seen de light at all.

But it cannot be, I say to her halfheartedly. There is no way this is true. Why not? She retorts so insistently, those bloodshot eyes widening at me. Because, I reply feebly, this is borne out of bullshit, nothing more. No, she says more sharply this time, and I feel the pressure of her fingers dig into my skin as she takes hold of me. Does she know how easily I bruise? Still, this is absurd. I don’t believe a word of what she’s saying. I’m not lost in my own consciousness, I say, my level of self-pity plummeting to the depths of hell and back. I ended up missing the joke as her chortling broke me out of thought. I looked up at her smiling face. You’re so silly, she says as she releases me from her grip. You’re so unnecessary, she tells me. The fuck is that supposed to mean? I ask, conflicted between insult and amusement. You just are, she tells me. There is no such thing as a standstill, no such thing as roaming aimlessly, it’s all in this round head of yours, she says. Really? I spit back, firing up all of a sudden. I’ve had it with this one. I’m over all of this, I say as I get up to leave. I storm out of the room and slam the door behind me for good measure, although it wasn’t much of an impression as the door never closed completely to begin with. I hear her laughter fade as I exit that ominous building of hers. What a fucking hyena, I think to myself.


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